he story of Yosef and his brothers should perhaps remind us to suspend judgment about others until we draw close enough to them to see them face-to-face and hear what they really have to say.
We read in Parashat Vayeshev of the unfortunate incident of mekhirat Yosef, the sale of Yosef as a slave by his brothers. Yosef had come to his brothers at his father's request, and the Torah tells that as he made his way towards them, "They saw him at a distance, and before he drew near to them, they conspired to kill him" (37:18).
Rav Simcha Bunim Sofer (a grandson of the Chatam Sofer), in his Shevet Sofer, notes the Torah's emphasis on the distance separating Yosef from his brothers. On one level, of course, this point is necessary to explain how the brothers on the one hand anticipated Yosef's arrival yet at the same time managed to conspire against him without his knowledge – they saw him coming, but he was still at a distance. Additionally, however, Yosef's distance may have precluded the possibility of reconciliation. The Shevet Sofer speculates that had the brothers not seen Yosef until he drew near enough to speak with them, they might not have thought to kill him. Recall that Yosef had come at his father's behest to report on the brothers' well-being. Had he be given the chance, he would have spoken to them in a kind and brotherly fashion, and they would have likely recognized that despite his dreams of kingship and the favored status he enjoyed, he harbored no animosity towards them. But upon seeing Yosef from a distance, the brothers erroneously concluded that he had come to find fault with their conduct and bring incriminating reports to Yaakov. By the time Yosef actually arrived, they had already decided upon casting him into the pit.
When we see people only "from a distance," our minds conjure up inaccurate images of their characters; the imagination is enlisted to take the place of verified facts as the means by which we make our assessments. Frequently, the picture painted by the imagination is an unfavorable one, attributing to the people in question all kinds of sinister motives and antagonistic attitudes. The story of Yosef and his brothers should perhaps remind us to suspend judgment about others until we draw close enough to them to see them face-to-face and hear what they really have to say. Then we will be able to reach conclusions based on concrete data, rather than imaginary portraits.